• Mignon Walker MD

How to Restore Pleasure in Strained Relationships

Updated: Aug 26

Learn the best ways to build a happy marriage and avoid divorce.

If allowed to unravel, even marriages with the best intentions can crumble under the strain of a million annoyances. Bitterness and resentment act as catalysts pushing the strain to the tipping point. Having been through ineffective couple's therapy myself, that sometimes left myself and my ex pushed to our limits, I decided to compile useful tools that can help couples avoid the bitter demise of their relationship and subsequent anxiety prone restructuring of divorce.

“It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.” - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Soon to be in course format that couples can use to supplement office based support, couples are carefully guided through a series of steps that help resolve smouldering and outright conflicts so that they can create a relationship they desire, from where they are now. It requires complete and sincere effort from both parties to move forward without destructive negative patterns; learning communication bridges; mastering and control of emotions; learning conflict resolution; rebuilding trust; working through issues like jealousy, trauma, and codependency; restoring friendship; and healing intimacy. There is no overnight fix. But consistency and proven techniques, and sometimes trying something novel, beats agonizing trips to the marriage counselor that end greater frustration and an expensive lawyer.


In the end, humans have a basic desire for connection. Without it the world seems empty and dark. Most couples vision includes a desire for connection. Not all couples who enter counseling ultimately decide to stay together. For some, the wounds are too deep and they cannot find a way to restore the desire and curiosity that previously defined their relationship. But for those who chose to stay together, filling their experience with positive experiences and good memories is the goal. And finding new levels of love and connection are the potential side effects.

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